#RandomFunnyPosts

After you read the prologue,you might be thinking,wait...I thought this was supposed to be a funny story...since this is a comedy blog...but the foreword wasn't funny for shit!! 
And then you may have thought....wait....this shit is not the foreword...why the fuck is the writer breaking the 4th wall and talking to the reader? 
Well, to answer the questions,
Yes. The prologue wasn't funny... because I am not a funny person...that's it...I have nothing else to say...so you could say that the whole blog isn't meant to be funny because even it's other contents aren't...even though they're meant to be... 
And yeah, unlike other writers,I am not a writer either,,,,so I can do whatever the fuck I want with whatever the fuck I write... 







It was a bright summer day in Mumbai...because there's nothing but summer in Mumbai,but that's not the point... It was a bright summer day in Mumbai,,when our protagonist... Dev was born..
Dev, cannot be defined as a stature of mediocrity...because he was even mediocre at being mediocre...now I don't know what the fuck that means,but I know that Dev was no more special than the 100 million kids that were born in India that day...
Dev was a decent kid...never pissed his pants..never peed in bed...was pretty shy at school....
He often confused the small letter 'b' with 'd',but his situation wasn't too bad to be dyslexic either...
Now,since Dev was just new to the life of a mediocre kid,he was enjoying the new experience...for the first 14 years at least...until he got tired of this shit.....and decided to do nothing..
Yep,you heard it right and that wasn't a typo if you were reading... he decided to DO nothing about it..
Instead he stayed home and watched some DragonBall Z...pretty much like the every 2nd child in the area...
One of the major contributors to Dev's mediocre life was his school...which had the same prayer before school,the same subjects,the same teacher and the same friends...
There was nothing new in his life...neither was he into anything which excited him...
He was no good at sports. But good enough not to get bullied by kids. He was decent at studies. But not good enough to get bullied by kids. He was like a brick in the school wall. He was there each and every day,and still, no one ever noticed him.
But Dev,didn't loose faith,everyday, he hoped that he'd get something new out of his life that day. And when that failed to happen,he'd say "tomorrow maybe" and would go to sleep.
Until 8th grade rolled up. This was pretty much his life. Even hoping he'd have an exciting life had become a routine by now.
But until the 1st day of the 8th grade.... 

Wanna hear an insignificant story about a mediocre man,born in a mediocre family,who was mediocre in studies,sports and arts, and was pretty much mediocre at everything he did in his entire life?
No? Too Boring?
Let's ask the question, why not?
Why read a story about an extra-ordinary individual?
Why read an under-dog story?
Because it's unlike anything you've ever experienced....
and why is that so?
Because you are a mediocre person...
Each and everyone is mediocre at one thing or other
The person is neither good at something...nor is he so bad that,eventually when he becomes good,everyone is going to appreciate the work....
I say it's tougher for a mediocre person to rise from is mediocrity to fame and riches than a person in a worse place!
Atleast the person at a worse place has SOME incentive to succeed! 
Unlike a mediocre person....whose life doesn't change....and remains as a mundane cycle of stuff everyday...for the rest of their life...and the person doesn't dare one bit to change that...
An escape for the mediocre person from his boring mediocrity is his mind...his thoughts....they are bear in mind,quite intriguing.....
Thus, the thoughts of the mediocre person,becomes the only thing that's anything but mediocre.

So,let's embark this journey...a life story of a mediocre person...from his own point of view...on how he struggled to become successful and a non-mediocre person....how he failed terribly...and returned back to mediocrity....oops....did I reveal too much? 
Until next time then....Bye!! 

-Maddy

Has any sane student ever woken up for school and ever said "Yayy!! I have exams today!!"
If you can recollect exams as a fond experience, you do not belong to the sane category....
But seriously, Exams...Y U DO DIS?

In my honest opinion, Exams are the the most useless pieces of shit after wristbands are Exams....and THAT's saying something.... those fuckers are useless as a rock to a gold merchant...


What's the point of the wrist bands? To wipe off sweat off the body? Well, it never works that way does it.. Either it suffocates your wrists to the point of your hands not feeling like a part of your body...or it gets wetter than the fucking hand!!
I mean...it HAD ONE JOB! To be dry! ...



anyways.,...back from the tangent...
have you ever wondered why exams are a thing..? Some say, to reward meritocracy,I call bullshit on that one,...

Why would you judge a 10 year old kid on the basis of one piece of paper written in 1 hour with the accumulated knowledge of 1 year and life experience of 1 decade? Seems a bit off doesn't it?
Did you know that the amount of mental pressure 8th graders go through these days are same as Insane people back in the 50s?

Would you say our life has detoriated since then? NO!

The number of exams and other bullshit associated with it has increased!

What happened to the times when the social structure had less pressure to know shit and more to survive?

I wanna go back to the times when it was cool if you were like:"Eh..fuck it..lets learn how to live."
Instead of "Oh My God,I have an assignment about a thing that I am never EVER gonna use in my life EVER"




Written By:A Loser....

Hey Readers!

Dude did you check out the new Mauka Mauka ad from fucking screen patti? It has got 250k views on YT.
Know what? I don't give a fuck. Like,its physically impossible.Scientifically proven. Negative Fucks Given.  I give so less fucks for it, even The Grumpy Cat,the legend be like,Bro,Bro Chill. Even I don't give so less fucks. 

So,in case you live under a rock(Please Skip This part if you know what The Ad is).
This ad is about a troubled Pakistani guy who doesn't seem to be happy with his life. Sometimes he supports Pakistan and sometimes UAE sometimes fucking Unicorn Land and shit. So this was a bit of a friendly banter between Cricketing Nations playing WC. AND WE  GET THAT. But then shitty Youtubers Picked it up and now it has gone to the shitter.

You know what? We get it. You need money. You need clicks. But sometimes using talent can be useful to do that too. Not always do you need to make a terribly unoriginal,unfunny satire of a trending topic. YES I AM looking at you Screen Patti. Sometimes come up with something original.

And the fact is that these are terribly unoriginal too. It's like Marvel movies. It rips off itself and shits all over the length of the film and still,somehow is successful.

Some ,to avoid being called unoriginal pieces of shit, even go as far to change the dialogue from the whole narrative! I KNOW RIGHT! And they fucking think that's going to salvage them something.

It's been what? 2 Years from when it started? Being a pseudo Indian Cricket fan,it has frustrated the hell out of me. And some vids are good. Don't get me wrong. But I'd still say,if you asked Nick Cage to act in it,even he wouldn't. THAT's how unfunny it is.

So if you are a content creator and you are calling 'Mauka Mauka ad spoof plz clickzzzz' content, you are dead to me. EVEN WORSE, you are like fucking Buzzfeed to me. Might as well write a shitty info blog about "What Celebrity Farts do you smell like".
Sincerely, please stop this shit right now. I can see the sadness and horror of your soul screaming to let some creativity out. Please. Stop this shit before it Rick Rolls all over your face.

Written By:
An Anti-nationalistic Piece of Shit who unlike other people who like this shit,isn't quite retarded yet.

Written By:-
An Unoriginal bitching piece of shit who is irritated by other unoriginal pieces of shit.

So,in the recent years,Games like GTA,Call of Duty,Counter Strike have come under fire to fiddle their games too close to reality and promoting violence...for more,let's put stuff into perspective.

It's been FIVE YEARS...

Fans have been dying to know the fate of their beloved Jon Snow after our favorite serial killer writer "killed" another potential protagonist of his story. These five years the World has changed for the worse and delay of George R R Martin's Books isn't helping us either.

Ironically for the past few books we've been constantly reminded that 'Winter is Coming', Let alone Winter we haven't even experienced the seemingly terrifying 'Winds of Winter' yet. Since 2011 the World's temperature has risen at an alarming rate and George R R Martin's age by 5 years maybe Global Warming is actually slowing down the Winds Of Winter and due to the writer's reduced life expectancy we might never see what Winter was all about.

During the period between A Dance with Dragons and Winds Of Winter. Brandon Sanderson another epic fantasy writer published 17 epic fantasy books of different proportions. I'm not saying GRRM should emulate him but at least be inspired from him and end his ordeal spanning almost 2 decades.


VALAR MORGHULIS...

      

Let's examine the other side of the story of people who used or abused drugs...we'll be examining two specimens. 

While recent doping news have come out, Maria Sharapova was charged guilty of taking some non prescribed chemicals,which makes me wonder what's the difference between her and Lance Armstrong,who infamously,was the wrong Armstrong not to land on moon. 

This picking up straight after the Jon Snow-Game Of Thrones rant of mine, 

So...this is my opinion... 

What a bunch of losers...

Dafq? It's like saying, "Dude, I got a cockroach in my Domino's Pizza....let's sue McDonald's for that shit!"  I mean...first of all, they both don't even belong to the same planet!
Oh...these drones are bombing me...these drones belong to an army...so what do I do? Attack unarmed people! easy!

It's like, "dude...grow a pair of balls." I mean, people who think it takes balls to be a suicide bomber, nope!

Getting blown up is not brave, getting caught carrying a bomb and getting your dick cut off is...
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...
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Written By:
Plz Dont Kill Me...I'm a f*cking pussy....

So...with all these comic book movies coming out,guess it's not a bad time to be a hipster after all...

I am gonna preface this by saying,I am a geek too...If you noticed someone getting kicked/isolated because of their love of reading books,I'd be that kid likely...

Fan Girls,the most exploited section in the world. 

Alright guys,let me preface this by saying,I'm not from America. Hence, I find the presidential race in America to be funny. There's so much name calling and lack of respect between candidates,its unreal. So naturally, for an outsider,its a beautiful Reality shows. Better than those fake ones atleast.

Jon Snow Back In News!!

Guess what? Nobody gives a shit! 

Jon Snow Wave 2: The Hairwatch. 

(Major Spoilers!! Jon Snow Sighted in set) 

Now:Milking the Dead Cow. 

I read it on 9GAG and thought this was a brilliant idea....So I expanded upon the idea...

Kanye West: The Rap. 

Indian Airplanes: Almost as cheap as its customers! 

Rants which probably wont make sense to most of you. 

                               Coincidentally, today was also the day when J.K Rowling confirmed that her new Harry Potter Canon,Fantastic Beasts and Where to find them,a 70 page novel,will have 3 movies dedicated to it. Which fits perfectly into the theme of this rant. Harry Potter and The Milking of the Dead Cow...:P . Now that's a movie I'd prefer to pay to watch! JKR we get it! HP was the only good book you've ever written! But at least give us some decent alternate storylines! We don't want a play which is inaccessible to pretty much everyone except the English guys! And a story about an american wizard?Dafq? I'm pretty sure you are making up stuff as you go.
                                In other news, Al Qaeda hacked Indian Railways website to post some shit to which I thought,"Who the f reads Indian Railways Website?" There's no time for typing to get a ticket! Leave alone waiting and reading shit on it! Like if you even tried to read it,a billion tickets would already be booked and you'd be forced to take travel to your native place sitting on the train's f!cking toilet. Which coincidentally is also the cleanest place in Indian Trains!
Thanks for the read.

(P.S:I Love Harry Potter,but I strongly feel that Hermoine and Harry should've totally made out.)

Written By
Homeless Talentless Piece of Garbage Shit.